K is for Kerosene Dream

Do you have music that makes up the soundtrack to your life? You know, those songs that remind you of a person or place or time in your life?

Kerosene Dream is part of my soundtrack.  They remind me of dancing with my brother at Good Times in Eugene, Oregon and dating/not dating a guy named Pat who I was in love with but not in love with.

I was in my late 20's, living in Eugene, going out every weekend with my friends and listening to groups like Kerosene Dream, John Swan and the Revelators, and Mark Alan.  Without sounding dorky, I have to say it was such a carefree time when I look back on it.  I made very little money but my only responsibility was myself. 

It was also a mixed up time.  I had a group of great friends for several years but through rumors and lack of communication, the whole thing self destructed.  It is one of the greatest regrets of my life that I never went back and cleared things up with one very good friend in that group.  I've looked her up on Facebook and I even ran into her once in a store down there but I never told her the truth about what happened, or rather what didn't happen.  That I never did the thing her sister told her I did.  Something has kept me from doing it though and the only thing I can think that is holding me back is that it bothers me that she believed the lie.

I just ordered some Mark Alan cd's a few weeks ago and have been reliving my past while I drive to meetings.  I know I had two Kerosene Dream cd's.  One was autographed after Pat and I heard them sing Ring of Fire.  I thought I was wanted to marry the whole band that night. They are all pretty attractive.  At least they were then. I think my brother has those cd's.  The thief. 

I had a friend who used to own Good Times (along with his brother).  We met on a sailing trip from the Dominican Republic to Puerto Rico.  He was a good friend of John Swan.  I remember being at a party one time with both guys and I asked John Swan whether the lady he was with was his wife.  He said "She's not my wife, but she is my life" and I remember thinking how badly I wanted someone to feel that way about me.  Oh the angst!  I heard later that they broke up so I guess she wasn't his whole life.

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