I is for Impenitent

Say you're bumbling along through life and you find that your employer isn't paying quite enough attention to everything that's going on in your particular field and that field happens to be accounting.  You discover that, through a little accounting trick, you can add quite a bit of money to your paycheck with no one noticing.  So you do.  Then, you decide that since they haven't noticed that much being added to your paycheck, they probably won't notice if you double it.  You continue on this path for at least 10 years.  Meanwhile, you buy everything under the sun for your children, their friends, your friends, and miscellaneous family members.  None of whom know that you are stealing all this money.

One day the real accountants come and start an audit on your company.  What usually takes about two weeks, turns in to two month, then a year, and then one day you are summoned to the boss' office and you're fired.

You go home, you tell the fam you lost your job but it all has something to do with an error you made on the taxes.  Of course, they believe you.  Until the police show up at your door and you have to admit to your husband that you may have criminal charges filed against you because you may have embezzled some money.

Over the next few months you eke out as little information as possible to your husband and children.  Then you go to prison.  On the day of your sentencing, while your children and husband, your parents, your in-laws and former in-laws, and your former employer and co-workers are all watching, the judge asks if you have anything to say, you reply "No."  No I'm sorry.  No I love you.  No I'll miss you.  Nothing.  You don't even turn your face to your own children.

From prison you write to your children and explain to them that you did it all for them.  So, it's basically their fault you stole $ 1.2 Million and they should feel sorry for you.  "All of the ladies in here wonder why you aren't supporting me" you say.  "I took you on all those trips and bought you all those wonderful things".  But it never occurs to you that your children would have rather had their mother in their lives than $250 jeans and a trip to Palm Springs.

Your children have now cut you out of their lives.  As heartbreaking as it was for them, it was easier than dealing with your continued lies and lack of remorse.  It was easier to not have contact with the woman who gave birth to them, than to feel guilty about her being in prison when they did nothing wrong. 

You still write letters though.  You still try to convince them that they are YOUR children (not that step-mother of theirs).  You still say things like "I forgave you when you made mistakes", except you seem to forget that the mistakes they made were kid mistakes and didn't add up to $1.2 Million.

Then, you set up a page on a "penpals for prisoners" type site asking people to write to you.  You list your statistics and in that list are several more lies, like "I have a college degree, I'm a CPA, and I'm an honest person" but the kicker is that under "Children" you say "none".  And you wonder why they don't write or visit.  And that is why you're called IMPENITENT.